P90X: "Alone" Day 22 of 90

A friend posted recently on Facebook about reaching a personal milestone of jogging three straight miles without stopping.  She said, "It may not seem impressive to the true runners out there but for me, it's HUGE! 6 months ago, I couldn't run a 1/2 mile without stopping! I'm pretty proud of myself."

I can't express how happy I was that she was ready to share a personal milestone like that, but I was dismayed to see her think it may not be big to others.  My response was, "‎...and you should be proud. The hell with other runners, you are competing with no one but you! Awesome!"

The really great thing was that she got 41 likes and 14 comments, all positive.  That was so cool.

It's easy to forget sometimes how lonely this can feel.  That thing inside you that pushes you is so private.  When it's really motivating you, it always feels like it's you against the world.  The rest of the world will always be there to make an excuse or to console you when you fail...but when you are pushing yourself, it's lonely.  It requires a drive so consistent, that you can't expect others to encourage you completely.  Oh, there are moments when you are being encouraged, but the times you are grinding it out...it's all you.

When you do finally achieve something, you feel like screaming it to the world.  But deep inside, because you feel like you pushed that rock alone, you never know if they really care.

Also, during those moments when you are enjoying what you have done, it's hard to enjoy.  The end result was to look better.  Somehow we have been made to think that that is so superficial that there is something wrong with looking good.  So you want to be proud, but you don't know how everyone will react.

Once again today, I was watching the DVD "When We Left Earth."  Seriously, if you achievers have never seen it, go get it.  It is the stuff we all are trying to be made of.  Today I was watching the footage on the first 7 Mercury astronauts.  There was Alan Shepard, sitting on top of the rocket to be the first American astronaut into space.  John Glenn always gets the big notoriety for being the first to orbit, but Shepard was the first into space after we sent a chimp named "Ham."  There was a flight glitch and he had to sit atop that rocket for four extra hours just prior to launch.  All I could think of was that for Gemini and Apollo missions, they had someone else there with them.  Not Shepard or the rest of the Mercury astronauts.  They had a lot of time to sit there and think about the problems and what their fate might be.

Alone.

Finally, when no one at NASA was comfortable giving the green light for launch, and after the delay had gone long enough that Shepard had to relieve himself in the space suit (another NASA first), Shepard was the final decision maker.  He said, "All right, let's light this candle...and don't f&%k it up."  Sorry for the language, that was a quote.  But I think we all get it.

It takes a lot of guts to do things when you know you are the one at risk and the one really making it happen.  Kudos to my friend and a big high five to all of you who are trying to better yourselves every day.  Many thanks to all of you who were so positive in reacting to her achievement...I hope you all know how valuable those comments are, even when they felt like they were easy to do.

On the workout...today was Yoga X!!  Weird...I really wanted Core Synergistics...but I am on week four and it is different.  It is supposed to be more relaxed.  It was still tough and I did three miles on the treadmill to warm down.  Hip was good, shoulder was great.

In the words of Alan Shepard, "All systems go."

Core tomorrow!